The Aftermath

by Dead on Both Shoulders

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about

This is The Aftermath - the sequel to Walking Into the Wind, digging into the events and feelings of the three years after we ceased walking directly into the wind.

credits

released February 22, 2014

Tristan Zemtseff - Guitar, Bass, Drums, Vocals, Piano, Engineering, Mixing, Mastering
John Henry - Additional composition
Aki Shindo - Additional engineering
Andy Eisen - Additional vocals on "Opportunity"
Ben Read - Additional vocals on "The Border"

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Dead on Both Shoulders Seattle, Washington

2008-2015

It was real.

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Track Name: Sky After the Rain
i feel like i've lived this all before in a different place

where does this all come from?
i feel like i've lived it all before
where does it all go?
not your standard back and forth

always moving, always changing
different expositions, conclusions stay the same

motivation fighting motivation
not sure if i'm lying
or if i should be

motivation fighting motivation
get up, walk around
sit here, calm down
this circle is only a jagged line

we know where this comes from
and it's a difficult place
we always try to leave
but there's a piece of us it holds too tightly

we know where this all goes
and we don't bother to stay for long
to avoid tedium
we always find ourselves coming back

look at the sky after the rain
look at its crooked grin
it knows it's gone for now
but you know it'll come again

it's stockholm at its finest
prisoner to what i love to hate
feels like i'll be here
for the rest of my days

asking myself what the crime is
no trial, no sentence
clouds form overhead
Track Name: Living Amongst the Flies
in this sea of faces it can be
hard to find a reason to stay afloat
feast your eyes, not your mind
close your ears, play the game

let's try each place
but we can't afford to take our time
ride the circle 'round and back again
try not to tip over midway

face one side and face the other
foolish as this may be
the product is what really matters
we're building a new bridge

standing on two feet again
living amongst the flies

'round and 'round it goes
'round and 'round it goes again
destination known
but the fruits of this labor are far too few

surrounded by loneliness
everyone the same and no commonality
eyes bleak and falling heavy
the rules of this game, they always escape us
Track Name: Stalemate
it's okay to feel good once in a while
and it's okay to fall
but is it all right to throw in the towel
and join the others in their world?

it's time to accept
what may have been fate this whole time
my knowledge is flawed
and my methods are subpar at best
it's time to accept
what may have been fate this whole time
it just might be
i'm not the person i think i am

could it be that if we keep at this charade
the ideal result will show its face?
though this feels like it could end up a stalemate
let's keep the path and traverse these waters

and while it might not be safe to say
that i've never had the luck of the draw
i'd wager this deck is rigged
i bet there's something in these cards

it's almost over
but we know that this will never end
Track Name: Patience
i'm sorry, but i should tell you
this is not what i came here for
there is only one answer i will accept
and it's not what

you would guess
i have no idea
of what i want to say
but the real problem is that

i dont know how to express this
but i will not wait for the words to come

i hold you all to this standard
where i also hold myself

and i don't have the patience
i just don't have the charm

there's something in the air
i just can't feel, i just can't see
Track Name: Opportunity
somehow, unlike the stories that i've heard,
this trail of crumbs has only led me away from home
or have i strayed so far that i've lost track of where home is?
is this what home is?
have i finally found myself?

but i catch myself trapped in this circle, dragging bodies in
one after the other, one after another
but what if this time it's different?

this is now the point where we have gone too far
we've taken it too quickly, been too forward, now it's gone
momentum ceases, the well runs dry
and now it's gone
but still we sing

i will not just sit here and let indecision take over me
i will take this opportunity
i refuse to sit idly and let this indifference wash over me
i will take this opportunity
i will not just sit here and let indecision take over me
i will take this opportunity
and if the stars don't align and just nothing will ever go my way
i will have taken this opportunity
Track Name: This Place
and how we got to this place
will never be remembered in full detail
but somehow we know this is where we belong
this is where we belong
Track Name: Walking Into the Wind
don't leave me here with these ideas
don't play with possibility

a stroll through the park on a cold afternoon
hearing the sounds that just aren't there

fill me with your apathy
the wind blows at my back

weeks are years and years are hours
dying to remember what couldn't be

don't leave me upstairs
with the dust and the incessant howling
of broken parts and dreams left for naught
just stay a while

take a seat, hear me out

if it's not the way, then what's the point?
have i been taught wrongly this whole time?
how is this supposed to work?

if only we could turn back and change this from the start
we've learned that this battle only goes uphill
we're always walking into the wind

curious times await us
left here with these ideas
this work we hate to love
treading the lines of the system

it's just cold enough
wind blows from the side
shadows melt away

time slows and all life comes to a halt

it's just cold enough to shake off the dust
force the eyes open and force the mouth shut
Track Name: For the Ride
i'm secretly afraid of the world
afraid of what could happen
always looking over my shoulder
but there's nothing there

but what if this time it's different?
what if i'm not just dragging myself along
this road of seemingly endless possibilities

i'm secretly afraid of the world
afraid of all of the eyes
even though i've given them
no reason to care

but what if this time it's different?
what if i'm not just dragging myself along

for the ride, we all pay a fee
rise and shine, it's our time to be
for the ride, we all pay a fee
and for a smile, i shed a tear
Track Name: The Border
it seems we've made it back around again
build yourself up just to bring it back down
tear it apart and destroy the remains

look me in the eyes and listen
no one is going to hurt you
unless you go out of your way to hurt yourself
you're a spider surrounded by flies
a rat in a maze that's actually a straight line

it all happens so quickly
i know why you're so scared
but you have got to hear me out

what will it take to get you to understand?
do i have to strike you down with the idea
that walking the border isn't crossing the line

it all changes so swiftly
what was i doing here in the first place?
Track Name: Been a While
it's been a while
and all that's changed
will soon amount to nothing
it all amounts to nothing
Track Name: The Aftermath
let's take a step back
all of this boils down to change
to cycling through atmpspheres
but when i become content with my surroundings
the desire to create leaves me entirely

what is there to write about?
this does not base itself in happiness
it bases itself in

fear and longing and sadness and self-loathing
when those are gone, it just doesn't flow
and it's gotten to the point where i need the flow so something comes out

and why should i want such a thing?

prolonged contentness flips itself on its head
it's become too much to bear

yet somehow it's never forced
i can't do it alone
the trigger is pulled
and i fall into myself

overexaggeration, expectations
lead me down this road again
i hold you all to this standard
motivation fighting motivation

and though i might hold these standards
and things might not line up at times
there's always a way around those details
the real point, though, is that
i end up at square one,
or whatever square this may be
because of this something, may it be the
desire to create or the dependency on my creations

my own dependency on my creations

even though i feel it's safe to say
that this goes beyond all of you now
this square's corners are rounding
and i find myself in this circle
pushing at the walls, finally i see

the way out is to want out